Missy: What is your sexuality?
Les: Well, Jan's straight, and I'm... controversial.
Missy: You speak fag?
Les: Oh, fluently
Courtney: Darcy thinks she should get captain 'cause her dad pays for everything.
Whitney: He should use some of that money to buy her a clue.
Carver: She puts the "ass" in "massive."
Darcy: You put the "lewd" in "deluded."
Whitney: She puts the "itch" in "bitch."
Courtney: She puts the "whore" in "horrifying."
Sparky: Cheerleaders are dancers who have gone retarded.
Missy: Hey perv, hand over your fifteen bucks or get out of here.
Cliff: What are you doing?
Missy: Making money from guys oogling my goodies
Cliff: Ahhh I didn't need to hear that. That was an overshare.
Courtney: Why does everyone have to go on a diet?
Sparky: Because! In cheerleading we throw people into the air. And fat people don't go very high.
Toros Squad: That's all right. That's OK. You're gonna pump our gas someday.
Courtney: Let's not put the "duh" in dumb!
Courtney: I hate to be predictable, but I don't give a shit!
Whitney: Don't play dumb. We're better at it then you.
Courtney: You're having cheer-sex with him!
Aaron: We'll be reunited at Cal State Dominguez Hills! I'll be the experienced sophomore, you'll be the hot new freshman. It'll be just like high school, only better. Dorm rooms.
Football Announcer: Our next defeat is scheduled for next Tuesday.
Jan: Hey ladies, wanna see my spirit stick?
Big Red: You are all fine athletes, thanks in most part... to me.
Darcy: Big Red ran the show, man. We were just flying ignorami, for sobbing out loud.
Jan: You know, all the cheerleaders in the world wouldn't help our football team.
Les: It's just sad. Cheering for them is just plain mean!
Isis: Hey! Enjoy the show?
Lava: Yes, were the ethnic festivities to your liking today?
Isis: You wanna make it right? Then when you go to Nationals... bring it. Don't slack off because you feel sorry for us. That way, when we beat you, we'll know it's because we're better.
Torrance Shipman: Oh, I'll bring it. Don't worry.
Isis: I never do.
Torrance Shipman: You know, mothers have killed to get their daughters on squads.
Christine Shipman: That mother didn't kill anybody. She hired a hit man.
Courtney: This isn't about cheating. It's about winning. Everyone in favor of winning?
Torrance Shipman: Awesome, oh wow! Like, totally freak me out! I mean, right on! The Toros sure are number one!
Torrance Shipman: Ever been to a cheerleading competition?
Missy: What do you mean, like a football game?
Torrance Shipman: No, not a game, those are like practices for us.
Sparky: I want you to think of what you ate today. Got it? Now cut that in half, this is called a diet, people, everyone start one today! Darcy, you should stop eating. You see, when you skip a meal, your body feeds off its fat stores. And if you skip enough, maybe your body will eat your ass!
Torrance Shipman: Courtney, this is not a democracy, it's a cheerocracy. I'm overruling you.
Courtney: You are being a cheer-tator Torrance and a pain in my ass!
Missy: All right, let's get it over with. Hey, Torr, get over here.
Torrance Shipman: Why?
Missy: My brother wants to check out your rack.
[Torrance is stressed after knowing they had stolen Clovers' routine]
Missy: It's only cheerleading!
Torrance Shipman: I *am* only cheerleading.
Jenelope: Can we beat these Buffies down so I can go home?
The Toros Squad: I'm sexy, I'm cute,/ I'm popular to boot,/ I'm bitch-in', great hair,/ The boys all love to stare,/ I'm wanted, I'm hot,/ I'm everything you're not,/ I'm pretty, I'm cool,/ I dominate the school,/ Who am I? Just guess,/ Guys wanna touch my chest,/ I'm rockin', I smile,/ If anything I'm vile,/ I'm flyin', I jump,/ You can look but/ Don't you hump,/ Whoo/ I'm major, I roar,/ I swear I'm not a whore,/ We cheer and we lead,/ We act like we're on speed,/ You hate us 'cause we're beautiful,/ Well we don't like you either,/ We're cheerleaders,/ We are cheerleaders,/ Roll call/ I'm Big Red,/ W-W-W-W-Whitney,/ C-C-C-C-Courtney,/
[Roar]
The Toros Squad: / Dude this' Darcy,/ I'm big bad Carver,/ Yeah,/ And I'm Kasy... / I'm still Big Red,/ I sizzle, I scorch,/ But now I pass the torch,/ The ballots are in,/ And one girl had to win,/ She's perky, she's fun,/ And now she's number one,/ K-K-Kick it Torrance,/ T-T-T-Torrance,/ I'm strong and I'm loud,/ I'm gonna make you proud,/ I'm T-T-T-Torrance,/ Your captain Torrance,/ Let's go crowd/ We are the Toros,/ The Mighty Mighty Toros,/ We're about to win it/ Just because/
Justin Shipman: Hey, I have to tell you something!
Torrance Shipman: I'm on the phone creep!
Justin Shipman: I realize that, and normally I'd be listening on the other line, but this is important.
Torrance Shipman: Ok, what?
[Justin Shipman jumps and farts twice]
Torrance Shipman: Ugh! Get Out!
Justin Shipman: Thank you for listening.
Football Player: Jan's got spirit, yes he do! Jan's got spirit, how bout you?
Nathan: Dude! You just lost!