Sgt. Gilmore: "I'm just looking out for you, Luke."
Luke: "You've been on my back since I transfered back to sunhill."
Sgt. Gilmore: "I wouldn't say that" (seeming distracted)
Luke: "So, you do like me then?" (playfully)
Sgt. Gilmore: (slamming filing cabinet and taking deep breath)
"I like you. I can't take my eyes off of you!"
Luke stares in shock at his sergeant for a second, then moves in and kisses him gently on the lips.
PC Jim Carver: Bradford? She's got about as much community spirit as Adolf Hitler.
[To PC Klein]
Cass Rickman: You look like Dracula with the flu.
DC Mike Dashwood: Anything else?
DI Burnside: Yeah, a garage full of bricks.
DC Mike Dashwood: What kind of bricks?
DI Burnside: The kind the third little pig used to build his house out of. Brick, bricks.
PC Cass Rickman: Smithy thinks the lotus position is having sex in a flash car.
DI Burnside: If you don't keep your eye on the ball, Jesus won't just be your friend he'll be your next door neighbour.
Sgt. Bob Cryer: Never Volunteer; it's an old army saying.
DI Burnside: I'll have to remember that next time I'm in an old army.
Sgt. Matt Boyden: When The Met employed Reg Hollis, they deprived a village of its idiot.
Chief Supt. Charles Brownlow: Did the prisoner hurt himself?
Sgt. Matt Boyden: Unfortunately not sir.
Sgt. Matt Boyden: Let's keep the off air chit-chat off air shall we.
Sgt. June Ackland: Either a freezer's defrosting, or we've got a corpse in there.
Sgt. Alec Peters: Best thing to do is to close your office door.
Chief Insp. Derek Conway: Yeah, and tell the world to Foxtrot Oscar
Trivia:
The show is called The Bill because "Old Bill" is the English nickname for the police. It is shown in many countries, from Brunei to Zambia, Gibraltar to Norway, and Israel to Saudi Arabia.